There were no fresh water mermaids, plain and simple. Oh, Barry had heard all the legends and fairy tails. But there were no mermaids to be found in lakes, rivers or streams. Fish, yes. Garbage, of course. Even the occasional downed B-52 bomber. Hell, there were even a handful of Sirens who’d retired to the Great Lakes. But, no mermaids. And there was just no explaining this to his mother. She’d heard on one of those chat shows, hosted by a crab or a lobster or something, that there were fresh water mermaids. Now she wanted him to marry one.